I hate fear

Today has been a good day – I was able to be focused and happy.

Tomorrow I give a presentation to the bosses to show them we’re ready for the webinar and rollout on Monday. Most of the day I was doing pretty good. Kept doing what I needed to do, no fear.

I thought about all the things I was thinking, that people depended on me, I didn’t want to fail, I wasn’t bored with what I was doing. I get bored really easily. OR – I become afraid and call it boredom. “Nah, I don’t wanna do that anymore, it’s boring”. But that’s what keeps me from finishing projects. That’s what sets me up to continue feeling like this.

“Make a game out of it” I can remember Davida telling Matthew that at the cookie store. See how many you can do in an hour, then try to beat that the next hour. And the next.

Matthew was one of those get-on-your-nerves types – I loved him! He was hilarious. But Davida wanted something to keep him out of his way.

How do I keep the “yes we have to do this today” voice in charge – without the “Nah, it’s boring” voice winning? I have no idea… yet. But I will.

Today’s video

(Yes, I’m still watching a video in the mornings)

Replace the “shoulds” with “musts”.

I should advertise every day. I’ve done that for the last 3 days.

I should make a to-do list every night before I go to bed. Yes yes, I should – which I need to change to “must”.

I must make a to-do list before I go to bed tonight.

Just for today.

So around 4 pm, I get an email from the guy that was mad about our software. He just sounded like a dick. But, I called one of the bosses, and said: “I need you to teach me how to be grown up in this situation”. She laughed, and she did.

But, I pretty much let that stop me for the day. I did what they needed me to do, but I was still mad.

I still need to get a list for B. I gotta wake up at 630 am. BUT, I’m at 25.5 hours already, can’t work more than 30. I am absolutely going to take advantage of that, and get the front yard mowed and edged before it gets crazy hot.

I’m looking forward to tomorrow. I will do well.

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